Wednesday 25 March 2020

The Silver Lining

It is most peculiar to see the vast majority of the population of the UK and elsewhere struggling with the task of social isolation. From the perspective of an Aspie, this all seems fairly commonplace:  Avoid large groups; keep your distance, avoid unnecessary journeys... However, it is fast becoming clear just how difficult this is for the majority of NTs.

With the 'Lockdown' in place, there are more and more examples every day of people failing to manage their own isolation and their distancing from others.  How can one expect a loving son or daughter to stay away from a seriously ill parent, a brother from a sister, a teenager from his friends?
I have always looked upon these connections with jealous eyes, but now I find myself strangely thankful that I do not feel the pain of their loss so keenly.  It's hard to quantify the value of something you rarely experience.

As I watch the news reports that are filled with a bizarre combination of human suffering, dry Government statements and overtly up-beat stories of people attempting to help out in their own way, I recognise the same characteristic hit or miss strategies that litter my own attempts at social connection. These are people attempting to connect with (so to speak) their hands tied behind their backs.  The Government and Health organisations are rightly concerned about the effect on peoples' mental health:  Anxiety is high, and not just because of fears about becoming ill, buying food and getting paid.  People have been cut off from their support networks, their friends, their families.

Oddly enough, I find my anxiety is less every day.  I was very confused and anxious when this emergency began:  People not behaving as expected is a particular issue for me, so the absence of logic demonstrated in panic buying, pushing in queues and the failure to follow social distancing rules was particularly affecting.  Now I am working from home and I have a better idea of what the next few weeks look like, my anxiety is dropping.  There is no need for social interaction beyond my own home.  I am forced to communicate using my preferred methods - email and texts, and I am in control of who I choose to interact with, and when.  I seldom experience these luxuries in my usual day.

It appears I also have the advantage when it comes to finding things with which to occupy myself.  I need structure.  In everything, all of the time.  I have grown used to creating structure where there is none, and this skill has been at the core of all the jobs and roles I have ever undertaken.  Therefore, I have had no concerns about moving to a home-working system, and arranging home-schooling for my son.  I have an endless supply of ideas to occupy my time usefully, demonstrated by my long list of hobbies and pastimes.  Keeping busy is important to me, and I am rarely stuck for something to do.  I have enjoyed tackling the challenges presented by having 3 IT-heavy consumers working under the same roof.  We each have our space and we each have our schedule.  We meet in the middle for meals and fresh air, and it's going swimmingly.  I can appreciate, however, how difficult this has been for others, especially for those with less experience with IT.

There has been much made of the wonderful work of NHS employees and the armed services and their response to this emergency, and rightly so.  I must pause here, however and acknowledge what a different experience this would be for everyone, if we did not have the access to technology that we we enjoy in this country.  It seems that, as soon as a high-street business closes it's doors, a YouTube Channel opens.  As soon as a relative is isolated, a Skype call is activated.  As soon as a school closes, online lessons begin.  Without the expertise of programmers, developers and IT staff everywhere, these connections would be impossible.  The speed with which they can be called into action and the ease with which they can be accessed and used is miraculous.  When I think about the number of Aspies I know who work in these roles, I feel very proud.  Where would we be without them?

NT or Aspie, I hope you weather the coming weeks with the minimum of anxiety, and hope you can stay safe and well.  There is always a silver lining.


A solar eclipse showing the corona.  A silver lining indeed.