I am, technically, a Catholic. Yes, I understand that this sentence broadcasts my indecision ('crisis of faith' is far too strong! ) I struggle with the idea of celebrating Christmas, despite my liking for the festive period. Religion keeps getting in the way of my enjoyment.
I am fairly certain that I do not have any faith (in the biblical sense). I have confidence in the progress of science, human ability, the tenacity of life… None of these include much translated, reinterpreted, and possibly, doctored 2000 year old records – they cannot be relied upon, so I will never be convinced to blindly accept miracles such as the transforming of bread into flesh. My intellect is my primary tool for understanding, and may not be bypassed in an act of faith.
I do, however enjoy my infrequent visits to mass. I sing in the choir, and sacred music is a great love of mine. I enjoy the ceremony and the ritual and even, to some extent, the company of members of the congregation. I am complimented on the quality of my voice, challenged by difficult musical arrangements and enthralled by the interactions of the faithful, but this is no different to being distracted by the intricacies of a spider's web, or swirling patterns of subatomic particles captured by an accelerator’s detectors. No, this is a type of spirituality I will probably never know.
Conversely, I think I do experience spirituality in a purely intellectual way… I feel immense joy at the complexity in nature, the elegance of a mathematical formula, the way water droplets, sunlight and air currents collaborate to produce the incredible beauty in the skies above us. The more I think about the chemistry, the molecules, the patterns, the forces, the probabilities involved, the more filled with wonder I become.
Surely whoever said "God is in the details" knew what they were talking about.
No comments:
Post a Comment